Lawyers for a resident of Mississippi today filed a civil lawsuit against a credit card issuing bank related to debts accumulated through online gambling. The case, filed in a Mississippi district court, is quite different from any credit-gambling case in the past.
In January, the bank, USA Union Bank One, took Douglas Biskette to court for failing to pay $3,900 he rang up at two online casinos and one Internet sports book.
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"He did all of the gambling, and I cannot be held responsible for his poor decisions."
-Douglas Biskette
Chimpanzee Owner
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Biskette is claiming that he can not be held accountable because the bets were made by his chimpanzee, which he has taught to surf the Internet.
"My client had no hand in any of the transactions in question," said Biskette's attorney, Nathaniel Fargas. "That animal should never have been allowed to place those wagers. It was clearly out of Mr. Biskette's hands."
Biskette, who runs a company that rents chimpanzees for parties, has been working with a few of his smartest chimps on various highly skilled activities. Three of them, he said, have been taught how to navigate the Internet.
"I have trained Mr. Minkers (the chimp) to operate a mouse," Biskette said. "He did all of the gambling, and I cannot be held responsible for his poor decisions."
A representative from one of the sites at which the chimpanzee played said he was aware of what was happening and acknowledged that it was quite unusual, but didn't see any reason to disallow it.
"Mr. Biskette did, in fact, tell us that the account was set up for a monkey, and we had no problem with that," said the spokesperson, who requested anonymity. "We don't discriminate. It doesn't matter if you're a woman or a chimp or whatever... As long as you're of legal age, we'll take your business."
Biskette said he began experimenting with his chimpanzees and the Internet in 1997. Mr. Minkers, the most adept of them, has ordered groceries online and is very fond of the game Tetris.
"He can't read, at least not yet, but he can identify pictures, and he knows what it means to click on a familiar picture or icon," Biskette explained. "He particularly likes to surf to sites with pictures of animals. He loves Ratemypuppy.com. There's something about puppets though. Pictures of puppets seem to really upset him, so we had to block sites with puppets."
Biskette said Mr. Minkers, more than anything, loves to play games.
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"The courts haven't seen anything like this before..."
-Kim Eltnam
Attorney
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"When I took him to Biloxi, he really loved the sounds and lights from the slot machines," Biskette said. "But they had a rule saying you couldn't have no chimps, so the next best thing was the Internet. There's no law that says no chimps on the Internet."
Biskette also emphasized that it was the chimpanzee's money, not his, that was being gambled.
"He washes the dishes, vacuums, takes out the trash, all that stuff, and so I give him an allowance, Biskette said.
"At one point, he was up nearly $6,000, but I didn't know when to cut him off," he added. "I just figured when he got bored he was done. Then, next thing you know, he's down $3,900."
Kim Eltnam, an expert gaming attorney based in Memphis, said the case hinges on whether setting up an account constitutes gambling or whether the gambling was the actual playing of the games.
"Because Mr. Biskette set up the account, he may not be off the hook," Eltnam said. "The courts haven't seen anything like this before, so it's difficult to say what will happen."
A hearing has been set for May 14.
Editor's Note: This article is entirely fictitious. Please disregard it.