A spokesman for pop star Janet Jackson told reporters today that the singer has signed a deal with an online casino for the sponsorship of her right breast. The identity of the casino operator was not disclosed, nor were the financial terms of the agreement.
Jackson, who maintains that the Super Bowl debacle in which her breast popped out during the halftime show was not planned, said she has no intentions of exposing herself before a national audience again. Nevertheless, she has agreed to perform at all times with a tattoo of the casino partner's URL encircling her right nipple. The unknown operator has been guaranteed nothing except exposure in the event that she has another "wardrobe malfunction."
"Miss Jackson has never exposed herself on purpose and does not plan to expose herself in the future," the spokesman said. "But Janet is obviously large breasted and wears very tight clothes. You just never know what will happen with all that dancing. Anyone who watched the Super Bowl knows this."
The star singer/dancer/choreographer has drawn heavy criticism for her display on Super Bowl Sunday, but the Jackson camp doesn't plan to make any changes to her act.
"We appreciate and respect the calls for decency, but will not compromise Janet's artistic integrity to appease broadcasters," the spokesman added. "She will continue to wear tight outfits, and whatever happens happens."
A representative from the casino confirmed that a deal has been reached and acknowledged that it's a risky agreement.
"The world may never see her breast again," he said. "We realize that, but we're in the gambling business. This is just one of many chances we take on a regular basis, and to be honest, we like our odds. I hear there's a lot more jumping and twisting in her new act. That bodes well for us. We'll see."
The agreement is said to be a two-year deal, with a clause for restitution in the event that an exposed breast is not televised because of the FCC's new five-second delay policy, also known as the "Jackson Protocol."
Editor's Note: This article is a completely fictitious attempt at April Fools humor. Sorry.